Naruthology
by hono ookami
Summary: Collection of Greek myths using Naruto characters. Yaoi, Hetero, maybe yuri if need be. Updated, Story of Eros and Psyche kakaIru
1. Hades and Persephone

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the Greek myths I screwed around with. They are owned by Kishimoto Misashi and the Greeks respectively. End of story.

Author note: As I said, this fic will actually be a collection of myths. These myths will each have a cast of character (will be different for each myth). Each person will have the deity name, what they rule over, any other info, and if they will be OOC. A content sign will also be put under the title to tell about what will be in it (yaoi, yuri, incest, hetero). I know this sounds all official, but just go with me. Please enjoy! bows Hades and Persephone Content: This myth will have yaoi/ hints of uchihacest (or brotherly love if your not that kind of person.)

**Orochimaru**: Hades, god of the underworld (aka Otogakure (Sound Village))

**Sasuke**: Persephone, "demi-goddess" of something (virgin)

**Itachi**: Demeter, "goddess of the harvest/ "mother" of Persephone (we'll keep him as a brother) OOC

**Sandaime:** Zeus, king of the gods, a little OOC

**Tsunade**: Aphrodite, goddess of love and beauty

**Jiraiya**: Eros, god of love (aka cupid)

**Shikamaru:** Athena, "goddess" of wisdom, strategic battle, handicrafts, peace (virgin)

**Neji: **Artemis, goddess of the hunt/ moon (virgin)

Kabuto: Gardener of the underworld (aka Otogakure) 

It was a beautiful day in Konoha. Sasuke was lazily strolling around with his two friends, Neji and Shikamaru. Passing the many fangirls/ boys who pined over them, they disregarded the thing people called love.

"People are so bothersome when they go up to you and go all 'Oh I love you!'" Shikamaru muttered.

"Oh. What about those who just lust after you. They use love just as a way to get into your pants." Neji agreed

Sasuke smirked at his friend. "Glad we don't fall for that shit."

Meanwhile in the Otogakure

Orochimaru looked up at the dark skies and decided to patrol the nearby countries to make sure there weren't any paths that would connect to his village. If he found one, he would destroy it before it reached the village and excite his disciples who would go on a killing spree if they had the chance. He passes through Konohagakure on his giant flying snake (a/n: I made it fly). Little did he know, Tsunade and Jiraiya were watching and scheming.

"Look at him, Jiraiya. He looks so lonely, eh?" Tsunade asked.

"Hm. He looks like he needs to see some of Icha Icha Paradise." At this comment, Tsunade punches the erotic Jiraya through some walls. "Do something useful for once and make him fall in love!" Tsunade hollered with anime veins covering her head. "But with who?" Pondering at this, Tsunade finally gets an idea. "Uchiha Sasuke! He's one of the virgin deities who call love useless. Anyways, he's too hot for his age. "Righto!" Jiraiya saluted and went off to do his work with his love inspiring bow and golden arrows.

Hiding in the shadows, Jiraiya steadily aims at Orochimaru's back in the area where his heart should be. He waits for right moment when Orochimaru would glance at Sasuke. As he sees his chance, the love bringer shoots his arrow.

Orochimaru glances at a boy and suddenly feels something pierce his heart. The lord of Otogakure felt overwhelming love for the raven-haired boy whose face held a sexy smirk of independence and the I'm-too-hot-for-you look. He just had to have that boy, in love and sex. But he knew Itachi, the demi-god's brother, would never agree to the proposal. So he rushed to Sandaime, the god of gods.

"Sandaime…" Orochimaru started.

"I know. I can see it in my crystal ball." Sandaime boasted. "My advise. Steal him away. I'll take care of Itachi."

"Uh. Thanks?" Orochimaru finished seeing how easy it was. Now he had to make a plan.

The virgin "goddesses" walked through the forest still ranting about the idiocy of love, lust, and such. But our little angst boy noticed something on the deeper in the trees. Walking towards it, he realizes that it's was a ninjutsu scroll (a/n: it's actually a species of flower) he had never seen before. Reaching out to it, his fingers brush its paper when suddenly he is grabbed by Orochimaru and flew away. Sasuke tried to yell out to his friends but his voice wasn't heard.

The two headed towards Otogakure and Orochimaru took the poor boy as his lover. Sasuke however, was miserable and wanted to see Konoha and his brother, "goddess" of harvest. Taking a pomegranate from Kabuto, he eats seeds to calm his nerves.

In Sandaime's office, Itachi busted the door open and marched right up to the head honcho. "WHERE'S MY BROTHER!" Looking up Sandaime answers quite calmly, "With Orochimaru in his village, why?" "You let that pedophile abduct my brother!" "Yes." Itachi could no longer take it. He slapped that lousy sucker right on the face and stormed off to find his beloved little brother.

As Itachi gravely searched, the crops died by Itachi's mood, making everything barren and cold. Getting help from a passer-by, he reaches the entrance of the sound village and brings Sasuke back to the light. But as they rejoice, Kabuto laughs manically and points to the pomegranate for the food from the Sound entwines the life of the eater to the land. Orochimaru smirks and lets Sasuke leave, knowing that he will come back. For every seed is a month of time to send.

THE END 

Yes, I know it's short and may be crappy, but I tried! Please leave helpful comments, random comments, or recommendations for myths I can do next.

Tune in for myth two: The Story of Zeus, Io, and Hera!


	2. Zeus's love affair of many

A/N: Hello! Even though I didn't get that many reviews, I will continue. I do want constructive criticism and comments. I give cookies to those who do comment. gives cookies to sister 13 wolf and mega kokoro Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Don't own the Naruto characters (Kishimoto Misashi) or the Greek myths (Greeks) I play around with.

Zeus and Io Love Affair 

Content: Hetero pairings/ love triangle. Hints of sexual behavior. sticks out tongue Swearing

Shikamaru: Zeus, God of thunder/ Lord of all gods OOC

**Ino: **Io, mortal (instead of being turned into a cow, she's turned into a boar)

**Temari:** Hera, Goddess of marriage/ Zeus's wife

**Naruto: **Hermes, God of mischief/ "son" of Zeus (he'll be a friend in this fic)

**Neji: **Argus, servant to Hera/ one who guards Io (he may not have 1000 eyes on his body, but he has good sight!)

As Shikamaru looks down from a tower in Konoha, he spies a beautiful maiden with pale skin and a charming body. It was love at first site. Even though he was the strongest of all the gods, he always had had a weakness for women, this one was no exception. Her name was Ino.

He decided to go down to express his love ( cough cough) in the shape of a storm cloud since he couldn't show his true and divine self to mortals.

On another note, Zeus's wife who went by the name Temari was aware of her hubby's cough behavior and knew he was up to something dirty. It wasn't to hard to find him as there was only one thunderous cloud covering one spot on a cloudless day. She went down to see what Shikamaru was doing.

Sensing his wife coming close, Shikamaru quickly changes the lovely Ino as a boar. Temari comes down and asks him what he's doing.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOUR DOING!"

"Uh…." The lord sweats as he tries to think up an explanation. "I…found, yeah that's it found, this boar and was going to give it to you as a gift."

Temari, knowing exactly well what he actually did decided to play along, "Really? Since it's suppose to be a gift to me, why don't I take it."

Knowing he could do nothing against his wife's wrath, Shikamaru lets her have Ino. In no time, Temari ties Ino up to a tree in her private garden and ordered one of her most loyal guards to watch the maiden-turned-beast 24/7.

This guard was Neji of the byakugan. With immense chakra in his eyes, he was able to sleep with only one eye closed and the other open. Continuously, he watched the girl no matter how boring it was.

Days past as Neji watched. Shikamaru felt unnerved and summoned his friend Naruto for help. Agreeing, the happy-go-lucky god goes off to accomplish his mission.

Naruto speedily ran to Temari's garden and found the eye sore (pun intended) sitting next to the boar. Grinning his fox like grin, Naruto sits next to Neji and starts drawling on about ramen.

Slowly, but surely, Neji's eyes close from listening to the boring stories the god told about the noodles. He then fell asleep. The god of mischief quickly kills Neji and sets Ino free down in Konoha still in boar form.

The jealous goddess heard of this and sent a gadfly to continuously sting the poor girl.

"Hey you! The one with the sunglasses and bug infestation." She points to Shino. "Go send some bugs on the boar now!" Shino does as he is told.

With the terrible pain on her rump, Ino runs across the world trying to escape the gadfly's sting. She finally fell in exhaustion in a sandy country. Shikamaru was so worried that he gave up his dignity and did the thing he could only do to appease Temari. Beg.

"Please!" "No." "Please!" "No!" "Pleeeeeaaaaaase!" By this time Shikamaru was in tears. Temari smirked, "Fine. But you can never see her again!" The "faithful" husband agreed and the forgiving wife stops the bug (ordered Shino to do it) and returned Ino back to gorgeous self.

From then on, Shikamaru kept his promise to never see Ino again, Temari was feeling normal again, Neji, sadly, was dead, and Naruto got off the hook for Neji's murder. What happened to Ino? She became the queen of the place she was pursued by the gadfly, Sunagakure. Everyone was in awe of her pale skin, which was never seen, and made her their queen until she died happily.

**THE END**

**Next time: The love story of Eros and Psyche (Love and Soul).**


	3. Eros and Psyche part I

A/N: I continue on even if it's a losing battle! In other words, I'm gonna keep making chapters no matter how few reviews I have. But thanks you Blonde-Existentialist for reviewing gives cooking and milk Ha, peoples! I've upgraded to giving milk! Please give ideas! I know it took a long time.

(\ /)I learned how to make a bunny/\ /\

( )o

Disclaimer: I own nothing that is Naruto (except for merchandise) or Greek Myths (except my book filled with myths)

The Love of Eros and Psyche 

**Content: This myth will have yoai (KakaIru) and swearing**

**Kakashi:** Eros, god of love

**Iruka:** Psyche (Soul), mortal "woman"/ youngest of three sisters

**Tsunade:** Aphrodite (again), goddess of love/ mother of Eros

**Mizuki:** 1st "sister" of Psyche

**Ayame:** 2nd sister of Phyche (I have nothing against her. It's just that she's not that important in the series and is one of the people who've seen Kakashi's face) OoC

**Neji:** Oracle of Apollo (Neji's all seeing. )

**Sandaime:** King/ father of Psyche and two other sisters

Sandaime once had three children. The first two were pretty, but the youngest, Iruka, was extremely beautiful. As much as Iruka was femininely gorgeous, he was kind. Many people worshipped him as the new goddess of beauty and gave offerings to him instead of to Tsunade.

As Tsunade looks down through the clouds, she noticed that her temples were empty. No worshippers, no offerings. The only thing there was dust. Her temper grew and looked on. She then saw all of her people bowing to a mortal girl! Golden wreathed Tsunade mind blew into tiny pieces in rage. She snapped her hand and summoned her winged son, Kakashi.

Folding his pearl white wings and put his hentai book away. Kakashi bows his head of bushy gray hair and asked, "What would you like me to do, Mother?"

"My child, you have always obeyed my commands so do me this favor to keep Mommy's rep up." She frowns as she summons a picture of Iruka to show to Kakashi. "Make this mortal fall in love. And when I mean love, I mean with the ugliest and wretched person on Earth. I don't care if you have to make the dude queer."

Unfortunately, Tsunade shouldn't have shown her son the image of the young man for love-inspiring Kakashi, himself, fell in love. His heart felt as if it was pierced by a thousand of his own gold arrows. It ached to be with the sweet mortal, to embrace him, and kiss him. Making a plan in his head, he agreed to Tsunade's request.

Sneezing twice, Sandaime felt a premonition of bad things to come. He knew the gods must be upset with Iruka's…"popularity," so he offered much to the oracle of Apollo, Neji, to see if there will be a suitable spouse for Iruka. Unlike his siblings, the said prince stayed in his room to be rid of the admirers and to stay away from his own cursed cuteness.

"Who will my dear child marry?" Sandaime asked.

The oracle Neji spoke, "He will not have a mortal husband. He is a winged serpent feared by all, even the gods. Leave her on a rock on the top of the mountain to wait for her dreaded husband. Hearing this, the whole kingdom wept in sorrow for their mortal goddess.

He was left there alone in the dark. Even though he didn't drop a single tear when coming up, Iruka's eyes were filled. Unknown to him, the gentle west wind, Zephyrus, gently blew his fragile body down into a secure valley. Temari and Zaku puff and puff to keep their fan and hands blowing wind gently to lift Iruka down a far distance without dropping him to his death

The prince stopped his tears to notice he was in a beautiful valley. He laid down to rest.

When he awoke he saw a palace before him. In awe, he stands up and walks towards it. The doors creaked open and let the man behold a garden. The curious dolphin walked down halls hearing voices but seeing no person. Reaching a bedroom, he sees piles of gold, jewelry, and luscious food. He quickly ate, untied his ponytail (leaving shoulder length chocolate hair), and rested.

A tingle ran across Iruka's neck. His eyes slowly open to meet with an odd pair. Unlike his, the eyes that were watching him were two different colors, one black and the other blood red with four black dots, and filled with passion. A husky voice whispers, "I love you more than you know," as an invisible hand slides down the prince's chest with a gentle touch. Down to his loose pants

The prince shivered at the touch as if he lost it long ago. A moan escapes his lips before an invisible pair locks onto them and a hand entwines with his brown hair. Even though Iruka couldn't see the body of his new husband, he could tell that the person was going to be his handsome lover.

Days passed. Iruka was in bliss. His lover may not show his face nor tell of his name, but Iruka didn't care. Even though he was happy, his family was weeping their hearts out.

One night when Iruka was snuggling with his love, (who was still invisible) his husband told him shocking news.

"Your siblings are mourning for you at the rock because they think you're dead. Don't make contact with them or else you'll bring sorrow upon me and yourself." Iruka looked at him and nodded. For the rest of the nights Iruka went to a depression seeing no hope of comfort. He stayed in his room to weep without eating. His lover grew irritated and yelled out in frustration, "If all you will do is weep, then go meet them!" Iruka looked up sadly with a shine in his eyes showing his plead, which could ease up anyone.

His lover sighed and agreed. Seeing his lover's doubt, Iruka gently kissed him on the lips. "Don't worry. I would never give up our love." They laid in bed and fell into a sweet slumber.

**A/N: I know it's been a while the rest of this myth will be next! What will happen when Mizuki and Ayame, Iruka's siblings, see him? Will the Kakashi's and Iruka's love disappear? Will Iruka find out just who his lover is? Stay tuned and review!**


End file.
